My Li'l Man is Turning 4

My little boy is growing so fast! From the moment he can actually say 'i love you' NEVER a day ends that i won't be able to hear him say to me "Mommy, I love You". Sometimes, he says it in tagalog, "Mommy Mahal kita". Those words are always accompanied with a hug and a kiss! How I wish he'll never outgrow it. How I wish the day won't come when he will get tired of doing it. How I wish he will say "Mommy, I Love You" for the rest of MY life.

Joaqui's 4th Birthday Slideshow from Ryan Rodriguez on Vimeo.

Half a decade of laughter and tears, in good times and in bad.. All through the years!

Yes, you heard me right, half a decade. I am happily married for five years already but it seems just like yesterday. I know five years of staying married is not something that I should pride myself on. And at this point, I’m not really the person whom someone would ask for an advice with regards to marriage. But half a decade of being married has somehow brought out a mature and sensible individual in me.

Some would say, “The secret for a happy married life is LOVE, because that’s the reason why you tied the knot in the first place”. Others would advice that for a marriage to last there should be trust, respect, commitment, support, intimacy, romance, etc. And the list goes on. While all these things are essential and important in keeping the relationship alive, I think these are not the chief elements that would lead couples into a happy and satisfied life together. I believe that a happy marriage is not guaranteed no matter how much the partners love each other. Thus, the song says, “Sometimes love just ain’t enough”.

For five years, I’ve come to realize that in order for me to be happy in our marriage, more than anything, both my husband and I must and should be happy first and foremost. Having said that though, I’ve learned that we should never expect anyone or anything to make us happy. It should come from within us. Happiness in marriage is there – we just have to always be aware of exactly where to find it. So whenever I feel like nothing seems right in my world and in my life, I just constantly remind myself with this quote.. “Happiness is not something far away and unattainable. It is always here, deep within my soul. All I have to do is dig it out and enjoy it”. HAPPY 5th ANNIVERSARY TO US.

Here’s a compilation of some of our wedding pictures that my husband put together in a video. Just want to share it with you. Enjoy watching!

June 11, 2005 from Ryan Rodriguez on Vimeo.

ON THE LIGHTER SIDE..

Parenting is tough.  But, I’m sure everyone will agree if I say that being a parent, especially to a young kid, can oftentimes be fun and blissful. Children have a bizarre and astonishing imagination. And sometimes, they say the darndest things.

I bumped into this article a short time ago and thought of publishing it on my blog to share and spread smiles and laughter. Enjoy reading.

Why God Made Moms Answers by second grade school children
by Valley Bugler

Why did God make mothers?
1.    She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2.    Mostly to clean the house.
3.    To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1.    He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2.    Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3.    God made my Mom just the same like he made me.  He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of ?
1.    God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2.    They had to get their start from men’s bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1.    We’re related.
2.    God knew she likes me a lot more than other people’s moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1.    My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2.    I don’t know because I wasn’t there, but my guess is she would be pretty bossy.
3.    They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1.    His last name.
2.    She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3.    Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1.    My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2.    She got too old to do anything else with him.
3.    My grandma says that Mom didn’t have her thinking cap on.

Who’s the boss at your house?
1.    Mom doesn’t want to be boss, but she has to because dad’s such a goof ball.
2.    Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3.    I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What’s the difference between moms and dads?
1.    Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2.    Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3.    Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power ‘cause that’s who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend’s.
4.    Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1.    Mothers don’t do spare time.
2.    To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1.    On the inside she’s already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2.    Diet. You know, her hair. I’d diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1.    She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I’d get rid of that.
2.    I’d make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3.    I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

“It will be gone before you know it. The fingerprints on the wall appear higher and higher. Then suddenly they disappear”. -Dorothy Evsli

This morning, as I was having my breakfast in front of the computer reading emails, my son approached me and with a pleading voice he said, “Mom, can we play, please!?” I was about to tell him, “Later, mommy is busy.” But then, a voice inside of me was shouting, “Go ahead Len, play with him. Your son will not forever be 3 years old. He’ll grow up and soon you’ll realize he’s no longer at your side.”
Time is precious. Sometimes, when I look at my son, I couldn’t help but shed a tear. It breaks my heart seeing him grow so fast and now doing the things that I used to do for him. But then I’m happy. I’m happy because I’m able to stay right here beside him, doing the little things that he’s asking me to, being with him anytime he needs me, sharing every single moment in the most tender and important stage of his life, his childhood. Someday, when he’s grown up, I would never have to look back and wish that I’d spent more time with my son. I would never have regrets.

Let me share with you a very inspiring letter written by a certain Lisa, a Stay-At-Home Mom.  Her letter is included in Dr. Laura Schlessinger’s book, In Praise of Stay-At-Home Moms.

Dr. Laura,

     As I sit to write this letter, my hope is that if just one mother can hear what I have to say and holds her child just a little tighter today, I will have fulfilled my reason for writing.

     By the time I was 29 our family was complete. I had three beautiful children, a loving husband, and although never money to spare, we found ways to get by. Although I had my mother and mother-in-law to babysit whenever I needed, by the time my middle son was born, I knew I could not work anymore. Something inside of me told me that I had to spend as much time with my children as I could.

     There were many days where I was pulling out my hair, found myself screaming at them, and was totally exhausted by the end of the day, thinking to myself, “Any other work would be a pleasant relief.” But there were also many moments I would never trade in for any job, no matter what the pay. Those moments when your child gives you a smile or a look you never forget, moments when they would give you a kiss, a hug, or just hold your hand for no reason. Those are the moments a mother treasures in her heart forever…

     Two years ago my middle son was killed in an auto accident. He was 22 years old. He was away at college when he decided to get in a car where the driver had been drinking; ten minutes later he was dead.
Our lives will never be the same again; the world as we knew it had been destroyed. We miss our son terribly. My husband, surviving two children, and I will never be the same, but we are trying to hold on to each other and pick up the pieces, one piece at a time.

     Dr. Laura, there is only one thing I can say. I am so grateful for those moments I had with my son. Those moments, the good as well as the crazy ones, I will forever hold close to my heart. All those precious years I spent with my son now are what help me get through the day.

     So please, Dr. Laura, never stop reaching to all the young moms who feel they can’t handle it, are struggling with making it through the day, who believe they “need” to work instead of being with their child, just how much it might someday mean to them to have spent those precious moments with their children. Hopefully other moms can just take my word for it: Don’t let anyone or anything prevent you from holding them, hugging them, playing with them, memorizing their smile, their laughter, their heart.                                                                     -Lisa

Never let a moment with your child slip away. Never miss an opportunity to spend time with your children. While they still want to play with you… while they still depend on you… while they still long to hold your hand…

I'm a S-A-H-M... and proud of it

     How time flies.. It’s been 3 years since I decided to quit my job to become a full time housewife and mother. I did that without having much thought about the kind of life I was going into. As a first time mom, I was really looking forward to being a hands-on mother to my child 24/7. For me, that’s what being a mother really means. All I was thinking that time was I would finally have a stress free life when I leave my job and I thought staying at home would be so much fun.

     I’m sure most people (well, that includes me before I became SAHM) have a myth in mind that the Stay-At-Home Mom’s life is uncomplicated for what’s only making her busy is just doing the chores, enjoying time with the kids, and shopping. Sounds easy, huh. For 3 years, I have realized that being a SAHM (Stay-At-Home-Mom) is no easy task.  It requires a lot of sacrifice and hard work. Not to mention the fact that raising a family with a single income is difficult in this time and age. I think that is where the sacrifice comes in. When I was still working, we could go out to eat or go to the movies anytime we wanted; we could buy anything (within reason) that we liked. Those days are over. To be honest my husband and I haven’t been to a movie theatre in the last 3 years. If only I’m working right now, we could afford anything; a house, a fancy car, holidays, etc. But we just couldn’t.

     There came a point in those 3 years that I became bored with my day to day routine. I have felt as though I have no outlet, no money, no independence, no career, and certainly no life.  I have almost lost my identity and self worth. Yes, I cried and cried a lot. Good thing, I have a husband who always shows me and reminds me that I am appreciated and loved.

     I think you are waiting for me to say that being a stay at home mom is not so much fun after all. Yes, indeed. It is the most stressful, frustrating and demanding job on earth. So you may ask why I do it. True enough being a stay at home mom requires a lot of hard work and sacrifices but the reward and fulfillment that comes along with it is incomparable to anything. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that stay-at-home moms are much better than working moms. It doesn’t even guarantee a parental success. I’m just blatantly speaking my personal experience and views. I acknowledge that staying at home is not for every mother. Families have different needs. It’s just a matter of priorities and choices. As for me, I choose to be with my children because they need my time and attention more than I need a pay check and a career.
AND WITH THAT I AM SO MUCH BLESSED.

The Gift

I got a very nice present from my husband last Mother’s day, a pair of earrings. It wasn’t an expensive one, but sure it’s special because it comes from the love of my life. It was not really a surprise for me because my husband asked me what present I would want for Mother’s day. Initially, I said nothing. But then, I remember what my mother told me. She said that even if I am already a mother and that I should always put my children’s needs before mine, I also need to spoil myself from time to time. As a stay-at-home mom, most of my time and energy are focused on my kids, my husband and taking care of our home. I am also reluctant to blow money on myself since we are a single income family. I’d rather save the money or spend it for my children than for myself. But come to think of it, mothers need pampering too. Am I right? We have to remind ourselves constantly that sometimes we need to make an effort to rest and pamper ourselves. As they say happy mommy equals happy family.
Ultimately, it’s not really the earrings my husband gave me that made me feel delighted last Mother’s day. It is the opportunity to practice what my mother has taught me which I sometimes forget, and that is to LOVE MYSELF.

Eating Healthy on a Budget

One of the most challenging jobs of every mom is to stay within the budget limit and save with the grocery bill without compromising the quality of foods that she provides for her family. But the question is how to do it.
Here are some tips that I want to share to other moms to cut weekly grocery bills, save money, and eat healthy.
1. GO for the Basics
Basic foods such as fruit and vegetables, milk, meat, pasta, rice, wholemeal bread and beans or legumes are important nutritious foods to have in a healthy diet. ’Extras’ like snack foods and soft drink can push you over your budget and add no nutrition.
2. Compare Prices
Do not buy on impulse, compare prices and watch for items on special. Using grocery store sales to stock up on such important staples as whole grain cereals, breads, etc. is a great way to make even the most limited food budget stretch a bit further.
3. Buy in bulk
Buy in bulk or buy the biggest size. But only if it’s something you like to eat and if it has a long shelf life. Stocking up on meats, seafood and poultry during store sales is another great way to save significant amounts of money. Take care though, compare the prices of large packages with smaller ones.
4. Plan your meals
Careful meal planning is another great way to save money. To do this, make a shopping list of all items you need for the meals that you prepared to prevent those impulse purchases that are often unnecessary and not the best for your health or your wallet! Keep a pad on your fridge to jot down things when you run out.
5. Use coupons and loyalty cards
Cutting coupons is a great way to save money on products you already buy. In addition, apply for the loyalty cards the grocery store chains offer and use it as often as possible to gain points and rewards.
6. Buy fresh but in season
Another excellent way to save money while still eating a healthy diet is to buy fresh fruits and vegetables when they are in season in your local area. Fruit can be expensive, so only buy what’s at its peak and cheapest. Have a bag of frozen peas or mixed vegies in the freezer as a stand-by. Nutritionally these are equivalent to fresh that have been cooked but remember to follow the directions on the pack and don’t over boil.